Cry my Beloved Country: A plea for compassion and understanding

What I write here is really how I think currently and many might differ with me. However, I would ask that we think about it because it is definitely part of the package to better understand the complexities of South Africa. I was really thinking about our expectations. Do we really understand what the sacrifice mean to reform the way we use to live under apartheid. We are used to a system where you study, build experience, work hard, build a nest egg, pay taxes and then that entitle us to a good life in return. The majority of people in this country was purposefully excluded from this by us. They were deprived of the privilege to have a job, career, dreams, nest egg, etc. Do we really take responsibility for our actions. There is no quick fix to this. Do we expect to quickly and softly say we were wrong and then have life as it was? I don't think so. For us it is natural to expect of the government to deliver because we pay rates and taxes. That entitle us to roads, waste removal, running toilets, water, electricity, etc.

But do we realize that the majority of the people in this country still live in a shack without electricity and without a running toilet. They wake up at 4 in the morning to pay half of their small income for transport to travel more than two hours in some cases to get to work. Do we have compassion and understanding for this. From my privileged position I can hardly imagine their pain. Because we work and pay tax we kind of demand these things.

But our world has changed. Some of us came to the understanding that what we did was wrong and we could not carry on like that. We realized that we must include black people in society. But did we really deeply understand what it means. Did we think life will continue for us as is? Do we understand that 80% of the people in this country do not have what we had for a long time. Do we understand that we must share with them what we have. Do we think they will just be happy for us to give them a vote but remain where they are. Is that kind of thinking right from our side.

No, it means huge sacrifices from our side. We were established farmers with most of the land. You do not build a farm overnight. You do not become a commercial farmer instantly. Were we willing to sell land or invite people in and help them to become farmers. To share our land and experience. Because I grew up in the Free State I use to have a lot of farmer-friends. I know how they talk and still do. It is not nice.

To reform means we are going to be inconvenienced big time. It would mean that a lot of what we have must be shared with those who have not. The cake is only so big. It would mean that we must be willing to cope with a lot of bad behavior. What do you think will happen when you give people access to things they never knew. It would mean a lot of bad management and behavior as part of the package. Did we expect things will just be right overnight. Further to this, did we think we will just find work for 80% of the new work force that enter the market. I think we dreamed an unrealistic dream.

This unrealistic dream definitely apply to black and white. Black people equally must understand the sacrifice and pain of the process to rectify this. They must equally understand it will take time for them to be skilled and have experience to take up top management positions. But we must equally not use delay tactics but share our privileges and experiences. What we experience today was expected if you think realistically.

Furthermore, are we willing to accept the pains that we caused. These people were hurt and disrespected like animals by us for decades. Just imagine the hurt of a wife in an abusive marriage. She suffers and hates for the rest of her life. It takes a long time to come to terms with the hurt and pain. Can we just expect forgiveness and acceptance over night. We will only conquer this thing through long-suffering, patience, love and respect.

We are quick to respond with critique when we are not forgiven. Furthermore, we justified apartheid out of the Bible. We told these people God excludes them from our church, as if the church belongs to us. This was not long ago. This was just over twenty years ago. Now as Christians we turn around and we expect things will just be different over night. No, we will have to make huge sacrifices and take a lot of pain before things will change. My question to us is, are we willing to make the sacrifice? Do we really deeply understand what we did? Do we really deeply understand what it would mean to build a new society that will include those we oppressed.

Personally, I do not think we do. For example, I still hear a lot of people say we sold the country and that De Klerk is a traitor. If we really understand, we will not speak like that. Let us be honest in saying to ourselves that a big percentage of our own people do not accept the responsibility of our actions. Furthermore, from the life of David we see that he paid for his sins although he was forgiven. Do we expect not to pay something for our sins of the past. I think some of the things we see is a result of our sins of the past.

We claimed to be a God fearing people, but we committed murder in the name of God and we lived hypocritical lives. Many of us claimed to be Christian, but we lived like pagans. We went to church on Sundays and swear like pagans during the week. Today we expect a blessing from God because we quickly prayed a prayer of forgiveness. I think we are unrealistic. Part of our forgiveness and healing is a huge sacrifices.